Big Sister

Dear Gabriella,

About two months ago, we found out that you were going to be a big sister.  It came as such a surprise and a shock to us.  In fact, I don't think your dad truly believed it until he saw your new baby brother/sister's heartbeat on the ultrasound.  As soon as I found out, I told your dad, "Gabriella is going to be such a good big sister.  When she's old enough, she's going to be so helpful, and I just know that she will be so sweet to her younger sibling."  He replied, "How could you possibly know that?  She's only five months old."  I told him that I knew you would be because you have such a sweet, wonderful personality, and I believe you will carry that with you for the rest of your life.

This experience has caused me to reflect on why Heavenly Father made us wait until after we adopted you to get pregnant.  Many people have told me, "Oh look, all you needed to do was stop stressing and then you got pregnant," but I don't believe that is true.  I feel very strongly that Heavenly Father was waiting for you to come into our lives.  He knew that you were the spirit and body that needed to be in our family at this time.  If I had been able to get pregnant, we would not have been able to adopt.  I have also wondered, "If you were meant to come to our family, why didn't Heavenly Father just help me get pregnant and put your spirit into that body?"  Well, I have several answers for that.  One reason is that he knew that your birthmother would become pregnant when she did.  He knew that she would look into placing her baby for adoption.  He knew that she was the perfect birthmother for us and we were the perfect adoptive couple for her.  As I have told you before, she has always felt like a part of our family.  Another reason is that you have your birthparents DNA, their genes.  I believe you got your sweet, loving temperment from your birthmother.  Your beautiful personality is a perfect fit for our family, and I don't know if you would have had that same personality had you been given our genes.  I also believe that your father and I learned a lot from the experience of waiting patiently for you.  We learned to have faith in your Heavenly Father's plan for us.  We learned from the sacrifice of your birthmother, and it strengthened our testimony of the atonement and the sacrifice our Savior made for us.  I also learned humility and that I should not expect or feel entitled to any of the blessings that I have, but I should feel grateful for all that I have been given.

You have taught us so much in just your short life, and we are so grateful to have you in our family.  Thank you for being such a good baby.  You sleep well, and you eat well, and you are so happy all the time.  I do know that you will be an amazing big sister, and I am so excited for all of the joys and challenges that will come with this adventure.  I love you lots.

XOXOXO,
Mom